How To deal RESENTMENT!!

Greetings for the day, every one!!!
Last night I was talking with a friend of mine. We were discussing about some family problem she had encountered recently-she was looking for good ventilation!
After a much long “description session” I found that she is harboring a deep resentment for one of her family members .As an Counselor cum a close friend, I was eager to help her. This resentment on her part was actually making a “mess “in her family situation and It had become a perpetual cycle of resentment and pent up anger.
Resentment or grudges do no harm to the person against whom you hold these feelings but every day and every night of your life, they are eating at you - Norman Vincent Peale

On way back to my home ,a much similar experience crossed in my mind. It’s quite normal in this fast era of competition, we get resentments in various forms and shapes from various sources. Is that really mean to forget all the rational thinking and “possessed by it”?
The dictionary-meaning of RESENTMENT is bitterness or indignation.
“Resentment is like taking poison and waiting for the other person to die.”

Results:
Self-pity: According to some opinion, ”it’s an attempt to excuse our own failure by attributing it to injustice or unfair treatment by those resented. Habitual resentment can turn into self- pity , which is chronic emotional agony which seeks relief in sympathy and servitude of others.”They expect undying gratitude for favors, attentions or services, which they might have rendered others in the past.
Burning Anger, vengeance, hatred: These things escalates day by day, in extreme cases it can manifest itself by murder or insanity.
In such cases a person with such issues should be advised to..
1. learn to avoid resentments.
2. Get rid of all the resentment.
How to deal:
IGNORE IT: Such people ,like my friend, should cultivate ignorance of real or imagined unpleasant past incidents, because past is done!!U can’t change it for anything, so why suffer by re-visiting down the memory lane!
GET TOUGH Emotionally: Just don’t let anybody to humiliate or disturb you emotionally. Dont “bleed” emotionally from every “cut”, because its you who gets hurt. Be too big for resentments.
“Resentment is one burden that is incompatible with your success. Always be the first to forgive; and forgive yourself first always.”
Dan Zadra Quotes

People should have a sympathetic understanding of the person they resent. If this analysis is done honestly and objectively, sometimes it can be discovered that in many cases we start or help resentment to escalate. Another step could be, apologizing directly to that person and talking it out. Don’t forget to mind self-discipline, because it will make sure that same situations wont present itself in future.
Resentment is weak and lowers your self-esteem.
Hanging onto resentment is letting someone you despise live rent-free in your head (Quote by - Ann Landers)

So don’t take yourself –or others-too seriously. The unhappy resentments are not worth it!!
There is a wonderful technique I came across in a writing of a success counselor, which goes like this..
Our physical body has a built-in “thermostat” which maintains a body temperature of 98.6 degrees no matter how freezing or hot atmosphere you are in…now we need to visualize an “emotional thermostat” consciously, and it will help us not to response in times of emotional turbulance. Please use this method.